Splitting up work at home equally doesn’t mean you do the dishes and I take out the trash. It means both partners share the mental load of running a house, raising children and tending to all the things that crop up. Kate Mangino spent time with 40 men who are equal partners to their spouses – as verified by their spouses – to write her new book Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home. What she found was the upbringings of the 40 weren’t always traditional – some were raised by single parents, some felt different growing up, some came from violent households. But their willingness to take on more of the mental load when they got married was summed up in a positive way: they felt it was better for them to be equal contributors in their relationships and they didn’t feel like that was a sacrifice. Admirable stuff. But listen to learn why so many of the 40 asked for anonymity and still don’t know each other.